A man with a past, you call him a stud. A woman with the same, you call her a s**t. A man with a career is a man who strives. Women with the same are simply bad housewives. In a world where even the king of the jungle relies on his lioness to hunt and gather, we as humans have belittled progressive women. You see an alpha and judge her for being too outspoken, too career oriented, too promiscuous or maybe just too inadequate to fit your lifestyle. You love her because she’s different but she’s too different to fit into your family. You love her monthly pay check but can’t stand those late night hours. You enjoy her stepping in to share your responsibilities but you won’t share hers. You love her bikini and mini skirts but use it as an excuse to accuse her of provocation.
Like gold plated jewelry our idea of progressive women is a mere scratch away from unravelling the reality of life. The same men and women who pride themselves on PV Sindhu, Deepika Padukone, Neerja Bhanot and Sakshi Malik are the men and women refraining their daughters, sisters and mothers from living their dreams.
Granted we as a people have come far from the sati movement and regressive laws but are these progressions confined to decorated pieces of paper? It takes me back to scene from the critically acclaimed film Dil Dhadakne Do where Farhan Akhtar calls out Rahul Bose on his ideas of a progressive husband. We all nodded our heads in agreement when Farhan combatted the idea of “allowance” but once the curtains closed and the lights of the cinema hall flickered on, we snapped back into our reality.
It makes me wonder, are we still a society in which daughters have to thank their parents for “choosing” to give them life while others are being killed at birth? Do we continue to be a society in which husbands “permit” wives to pursue a career? Is our society definitive of brothers who pride themselves on “allowing” their sister to wear jeans to college while their friends won’t even allow a kurta with leggings?
Maybe it’s time women realized they don’t need “allowing”. Maybe it’s time s**t and bad house wife became a compliment. Maybe it’s time we stopped calling her your “beta” and proudly acknowledged her as your beti. Maybe it’s time India saw some more alpha females. And remember and alpha doesn’t need allowing to grow, she emerges on her own!