We are hours away from one of the most celebrated festivals of love. One of the many legends has it that a man named Valentine professed his love for a princess whereafter he was sentenced to imprisonment and later death. Others say it was due to his kind, loving and priestly nature that he was sentenced to death. Either ways, Valentine was a man who believed in loving others so much so that he was willing to be a martyr to love. Fast forward to 2017, love has become a game. Shedding light on the state of love in the 21st century, television personality and celebrated RJ Shardul Pandit pointed out the nearly extinct state of love in today’s world.
His recent Facebook status states, “Valentine is on Tinder?? Every year this time the world gets divided in two. Ones who are lucky few who have found the better half( or so we think?) , second the ones who have looked hard (are still looking) . The unapologetic shouting from the rooftop lovers( booking dinners, posting couple goal pics, surprising their better halves) . Then there are those who kind of find it all silly, some even annoying. Yet I have lived both the sides. I am a romantic at heart but it’s just that I have grown up to find this day very amusing. I am not sure if it’s my maturity or the lack of that storybook better half. What I am sure is love as I know or would like is dying.. it is dying in the age of dating. Where every date is a potential yet the first signs of it being what we want , we break away. In the age of instant sex, tinder ,hinge can love exist? I would like to believe yes. There are those who have beautiful relationships or at least it seems for few years. Gala weddings, grand proposals. Yet there is cheating, sometimes rationalized one. Differentiating between sex and love. Saying love is different from sex. Is it? There are breakups as frequent as a teenagers acne outburst. No one is dying or crying? Not for long. Shopping and alcohol or random hook ups take care of that. We all are smarter, informed, better groomed, have 1000 apps to connect and find love. Yet not all of us are in love. Or not all of us all in happy relationships. Is it that the ones who have found it are luckier? nicer? Or simply have realistic ideas of love? The singles out there ..are we scarred? Flawed ? Or simply the ones who have very high expectations of love. I grew up on the idea of a fantasy romance. The one where we Live happily ever after. Yet I question myself at times is there a happily ever after? Specially in the age where all of us invest more in our gyms and amassing things that’s our lover. In the age where we are tight career or the set help definition of you is more important . Where we are taught to move on (pushed, ridiculed, judged) from love like it was the last burger we ate. In today’s time.. I really question if it exists? Do we have to lower our expectations? Do we need to settle down? Do we need to not prioritize? Do we need to be in meaningless umpteen relationships in the name of living in the moment? Do we need to act we are enough and don’t care? Or do we need more time to swipe that one more time?”
The post makes one wonder how sad the world has truly become. It’s sad that people today are in love with the idea of love and not the person they are engaged in the act of love with. The grandiose image of love has taken away from the essence of the emotion. Electronics, smartphones etc have in turn turned us into the robotic devices we think we exercise control over. Family dinners have become a scheduled holiday meeting, hangout with friends is something you have to fit into a calendar, dinner dates are just a prerequisite to getting into someone’s pants. This Valentine’s Day take the time out to understand love before you express it. It doesn’t have to be for a significant other. Learn to love yourself, your friends, your family or a complete stranger in need of love and assurance. That may be the only way we may be able to keep love from going extinct.